There is an internal issue to those who feel like they don’t need anybody. They feel like they can do everything on there own. Or perhaps they feel like they have succeeded this far in life by themselves and the need to having support is not necessary.
It is necessary. I know this because I use to be that person. That stubborn person, this highly independent person who didn’t need anybody. I’m still learning to not be so strong willed and remove this feeling of control. So let me tell you,
you need all the help, back up, comfort, encouragement, reassurance, mental aid, emotional support, friendship reinforcement, and family guidance you can get. It keeps you grounded, balanced, and not to mention, sane. And it’s not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength and growth. It’s a mature acknowledgment of realizing that you cannot do everything or handle everything by yourself. And it’s perfectly fine to ask for it. I have learned the hard way on many occasions of trying to carry burdens on my shoulders or afflict a load of stress or worry internally. It can and will be heavy and worse, become damaging to your body, mentally and physically. So ask for it when needed.
And be sure to choose your support system wisely.
I say this because not everyone is here to help or be that much needed listening ear nor are they here to provide you truthful, sincere, direct, or honest feedback.
- Some people will only tell you what you want to hear. That’s great and all, but it’s not genuine feedback or support. I like someone who can give me an unbiased opinion or tell me when I am right or wrong.
- Some people only want to hear your problems to compare and to make themselves or their lives seem better. I call this the reversed ego. It’s a waste of your time. Spare these people your life decision, hardships, success, and accomplishments. They are here for the wrong reasons.
- Some people are here for the gossip. You are not here for their entertainment.
Through your relationships with people including friendships, significant other, and family, your support system should be able to listen without interruption, make time without feeling inconvenienced, and make do if action must take place when you are in need. I turn to my family the most because they are the most reliable support system in my world. I have friends that will stop their world for me if I asked. And I understand that not everyone has that. But you must try to find that one person or group of people that you can trust, can be straightforward with you and back you up when you need it. And don’t expect those to know that you need help. They won’t know unless you express the need for guidance. So ask for it.
Asking for help runs deeper than just needing advice sometimes. There are people that are struggling in complete inner turmoil and need mental and psychological assistance. I hope you find the courage to ask for help when you need it. Don’t let it be too late. And don’t be mad at the people who have tried to help and have let go. They have not given up on you. But you have to be willing to seek help to be helped.
And do not be ashamed to see professional guidance for advice and comfort.
As you ask for support, don’t forget to support those who need it.